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23 things that suck about living in San Francisco (and 5
that make it worth it)

By Victor Beigelman On
September 3,
2013 · 10
Comments

1. Rent

Let’s get this one out of the way. Rent is high.

2. Peter Shih / start-up bros

(via)

Oh Peter Shih. We love you. You took a stab at a satirical blasting of San
Francisco and fell horribly, terribly flat. Thanks for giving the city a chance
to unite in glorious fashion to crucify you and your pretentious complaints.
You’re the loudest proof that start-up / tech folk need to spend less time
whining about their surroundings and actually contribute to the city in which
they’ve skyrocketed rent.

3. 2am last call

(via)

It seems like 2am comes earlier and earlier every time you go out. This may
have something to do with not arriving at the bars until 1am. Nevertheless, 2am
last call seriously puts a damper on a good time. There has been some recent
talk about getting this extended to 4am like a normal, civilized metropolis.

4. Never getting to wear shorts

The coldest winter Mark Twain ever spent was a summer in San Francisco. Sad,
but there’s never been a more accurate and potent description of the city’s
weather. Living in SF gives validation to the unreasonable amount of time you
spend searching for the perfect pair of jeans.

5. Bandwagon fans

(via)

The recent upswing in Bay Area sports has breathed significant life into the
city. This is good for the most part, until you have to start putting up with
new fans who don’t know a baseball from an avocado (just kidding, this is
California, everyone knows what an avocado looks like).

On the real though, going to AT&T Park on a Friday is like a
sports-themed frat party. Bandwagoners throw on a hat and drink $9.50 beers
until they throw up on the season-ticket holders actually watching the
games.

6. The lack of jobs actually in SF

(via)

An unreasonable number of people are making the reverse commute every day —
Silicon Valley and the fleet of Google buses are the dead giveaway why. Not that
we need all the tech companies to cram into the city (nor do we want that to
happen), but that’s not the only industry underrepresented in the city.

Part of keeping the “small big city” feel means keeping the businesses out —
consider yourself extremely lucky if you both live and work in San
Francisco.

7. 16th and Mission

(via)

Although gentrification is in full swing up and down Valencia, parts of
Mission remain terrible black holes. None is worse than the 16th and Mission
Bart station. ‘Culture’ is fine and everything, but let’s find a way to promote
it without pissing everywhere and shouting gibberish at people trying to go
about their daily lives.

8. The unreliability of Muni / Caltrain

(via)

Might as well delete your Transit / iNextBus / Google Maps public transport
apps, because they aren’t going to help you get anywhere on time.

9. The creeping fear of an earthquake

(via)

Let’s not jinx anything.

10. The new Bay Bridge that will never be finished

(via)

We’re using over six billion taxpayer dollars and can’t get the nuts and
bolts right? Come on.

Read more: What
NOT to do in San Francisco

11. People in Oakland who think they’re cooler than you

(via)

Just because living in Oakland is more alt than San Francisco doesn’t make it
better. You can still live in San Francisco and not be pretentious.

12. Dating

(via)

While OkCupid, Grindr, and Tinder are great sources of entertainment, forming
actual, meaningful relationships in San Francisco can be tough. If you do find
someone worth splitting a Netflix account with, they more than likely have
either a boyfriend, girlfriend, or murder charge.

13. Paying $8+ to take Bart to SFO

(via)

This actually makes sense, but it’s still a pain in the ass to pay over twice
the amount you pay to get anywhere else on Bart just to get to the airport.

14. Waiting at least an hour to be seated for brunch unless you go at 10am

(via)

Brunching is a competitive sport in San Francisco, and it’s not for the weak
of wallet or heart. Like a strip of bacon, you can really get burned out here.
The key is being prepared to wait. That means the two most common reasons to
brunch — being hungry and being hungover — are not encouraged.

15. Leaving the Mission when it’s 75 degrees to go to the Richmond where
it’s 60

(via)

See #4. If you want any chance at warm weather, don’t venture toward the
ocean. Be wary of dressing lightly even if the sun’s shining downtown. Once you
move west and the fog grabs you, it’s not going to let go.

16. Taxi drivers complaining about Lyft

(via)

Honestly, why are you mad at us? We like convenience. The customer is always
right. When someone comes in and disrupts your market, you adapt. Quit
complaining and stop taking the long way with the meter on. We can see what
you’re doing.

17. The End Up being the only place to go after 2am

(via)

See #3. The End Up is fun, but we don’t need to group all the people who like
staying out past 2am in one place. Let’s get a few more options and avoid this
strange mixed bag of night owls.

18. Parking

(via)

Doesn’t matter if you had the best day of your life. 20 minutes of looking
for a spot around your apartment will get rid of that, no problem.

19. Biking up hills

(via)

Like that bead of sweat inching its way down your back, biking up hills is a
terribly disgusting and slow process. If only there were a Wiggle
for every daunting hill.

20. Neighborhood stereotypes

(via)

Yeah, the Mission is full of hipsters. Yeah, the Haight is full of hippies.
But this isn’t a complete representation of either neighborhood, despite what
bourgie restaurants and vagrants will suggest on the surface, respectively.
Stereotypes exist for a reason, but it sucks that you get slapped with a label
immediately when you move into your apartment.

21. The beach that isn’t the beach

(via)

In a hostel in Europe, you will tell four French girls that you are from
California and they will ask if you surf every day. You will show them the scar
from when you got your appendix out and tell them you wiped out on some rocks
back in ’07.

The beach in SF isn’t the beach, and it’s time we accept this.

22. $5 coffees

(via)

I once read in a history book that coffee used to be a complimentary drink
given away for free. What a novel concept.

23. You can’t get Chinese food in the Mission, or a burrito in the
Richmond

(via)

The food in the city is incredible, but often you’re limited by the
neighborhood you live in. Sure, San Francisco is only 7×7 miles, but it all
becomes relative. Who wants to make the trek to go get amazing dim sum in the
Richmond if you live in the Mission? Yep, fourth burrito this week.

And the 5 that make it all worth it

1. The food

(via)

Despite neighborhood restrictions, you really can’t go wrong with food in the
city. The gourmet cuisine from all around the globe will almost make you forget
there’s a bill coming.

2. All the different people

(via)

Sportos, motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, wastoids, dweebies, and dickheads
— for better or worse, you will find all walks of life in San Francisco. Each of
them contribute a unique aspect to a city overflowing with culture.

3. The outdoors

(via)

The city is one big photo opp. Whether it’s going on a bike ride in Golden
Gate Park, taking a hike up Twin Peaks, or getting down with the kids in Dolores
Park, the city is one of the best places in the world to spend time outside all
year long, shorts or no.

4. The apps

(via)

You can’t count the number of apps created just to improve your social life
in San Francisco. Sosh, Nextdoor, Grouper, UpOut, Spoton.It, the list goes on.
And of course, who could forget Lyft.

5. Progressivism

(via)

There is progressivism and there is San Francisco progressivism. San
Francisco is the most forward-thinking place in the country, and we’re mighty
proud of it. There isn’t an alternative lifestyle that isn’t accepted here — as
long as you recycle.

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Posted in:

Culture
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Destinations:

San
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About The Author

Victor Beigelman

Victor is a writer, TV binge-watcher, and sandwich connoisseur who lives in
San Francisco. Follow him on Twitter @vbeigelman.

Drew

The new bay bridge span just opened today!

http://ianrobinson.net/ Ian

I think Golden Gate Park should make the list of 5 reasons it’s cool to
live in SF.

Thanks for the list.

Grant Lamer

“Although gentrification is in full swing up and down Valencia, parts of
Mission remain terrible black holes”

Seriously? Worst choice of words EVER.

Also that area has always been like that, and like seriously you need to
calm down if you’re freaking out about if someone’s asking you for money or is
unappealing to your nostrils, eyes, or overly sensitive white privilege
bubble.

Sorry that came across harsh, but like really REALLY poor choice of words
there.

guido35

sorry I’d argue that Progressivism belongs in the things to hate.
Progressive = liberal and that’s what’s ruining our
country

Phil

You’re wrong about the Burrito and Chinese food in the Richmond and
Mission. You should point out, getting a bag after ordering to-go is not
prohibited or it’s gonna cost you. I’m sure there are way more valid points
that replaces numbers 9 and 10, other than that, the rest of them can’t be any
more true.

Phil

I meant, is prohibited.

joe

#14, #16, #20 can apply to other cities too

alarimbaud

Have to agree with Grant Lamer. There also seems to be an irony to
condemning the tech boom (#2) while also begging for gentrification to gloss
over 16th & Mission (#7… and the fact is, while those *sorts* may offend
your delicate sensibilities, they’re generally harmless, many even cool if you
talk to them – I’ve never had a problem).

Also, Mark Twain never said #4 (and I love the weather, see #15), some
eyerolling with #3 (showing a picture with Lands End, representative of the
outdoors, with the landscape AFTER a huge portion of forested area was torn
down and paved over for “improved visitor experience”). Many people do surf
and enjoy the beaches (#21) – perhaps fewer now in “modern San Francisco”, but
such people do exist. Dating (#12) is what you make of it, as is the case
anywhere. I remember the ’89 quake (#9) being kinda fun (but I was little),
and a morbid part of me hoping for one to come and scare off those of #2.
There are actually burrito places in the Richmond (Chino’s, Gordo, etc…) and
Chinese places in the Mission (Heung Yuen, Wild Pepper, etc…) – #23.

For #2 of the pros – yes, diversity is great, but can’t anyone these days
appreciate it without patting themselves on the back for how “accepting” they
are of “all the different people” (seems a bit marginalizing/patronizing,
no?)? Same for #5 (SF isn’t nearly as “forward thinking” as it once was – has
become stomping ground for transplants who like their pseudo-liberalism with a
dash of the nanny-shelter from their Midwestern upbringing – see: those who
complain about #7). Love #4 of the pros all you want, but be careful of
crossing the line into hypocrisy when criticizing #2 of the cons.

Etc, etc, etc…

LA2SF

I hope to move up to SF in the next few months. Where should I NOT move
to?

Templeson Greendove

yea- probably the most socially disappointing conglomeration on earth –
dead after 8pm – dullest city on earth frankly – nice bridge – but send me a
postcard – NEVER again

This
Thai bra commercial will make you look twice [nsfw]

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